Realising that “smacked up my donkey” returned zero Google results, Eurojism decided it had to become nr. 1 at something. So here goes with a list of statistically improbably phrases which will see advertising revenue for obscure word combinations go through the roof. All of the below phrases (with inverted commas) result in ZERO Google search results.

Who would have thought we could have so much fun in one day?

“smacked up my donkey”

There was actually one result for “smacked my donkey“. Only one. Can you believe that? Guess that people smacking up their donkeys don’t spend a lot of time on the internet.

“snorted strawberry juice”

Purely autobiographical this one. Some kid bet me that I wouldn’t snort strawberry juice. So I did. I snorted strawberry juice. That’s a story for another time.

“dusted his index finger”

“smelled like wet cake”

“recounted his feet”

“vowed never to darn again“, “creeping about in his eye“, “hemorrhoids are tasty“, “trickled like spunk” … etc etc bored now Dad can I go and play?

That’s all for now! Your suggestions welcome, as always, in the comments section!